Tag Archives: Empower

30 Day Non Violence Challenge

Posted on August 1, 2011 | Leave a comment

I don’t think of myself as a violent person. I do good deeds. I’m nice to others. I even helped a women load a case of paper into her car in front of Staples the other day.
My Yoga instructor, Robin Howard, started practicing and teaching yoga as healing process in her own life.

Robin states, “Often when we start to treat ourselves with the love and respect we would offer an honored guest, we make great strides in feeling happy, peaceful and whole.” This couldn’t be more in line with what I feel I do for a living to empower people to discover their gifts, talents and self worth or more simply to be true to them.
We often do things to ourselves that we would never consider doing to others or say words that hurt others and then say, “I was just having a bad day.” What if we learned other ways to express our feelings, and to ask for what we want without hurting ourselves or others?

Robin came up with a great list for treating ourselves, others and even the planet with respect and love we all deserve.

Robin’s List:
• No negative self-talk
• No harsh words to others. If you slip, just notice and apologize
• No gossip or trash talking others
• No violent images or words from TV, movies, music
• No violent speech
• Adding at least one more entirely plant-based meal a week

I’ll post about my experiences and would love to hear from you about your experiences.

Until next time,

Amy Barnes MA MBA LMHC
Twitter @coachingwithamy

http://www.facebook.com/CoachingwithAmy

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Posted in commitment, Empower, Uncategorized

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Is Your Fear Real?

Posted on July 23, 2011 | Leave a comment

Years and years ago at the height of my extreme introvert self – yes I am a recovering extreme introvert and I still need plenty of me time – I interviewed for and actually worked as a sales rep for Xerox. The job involved lots of cold calling and high pressure sales which I now know was a job that in no way suited who I was then or ever would be. However, I learned a tremendous amount, particularly about listening skills which has served me quite well. More often than I would like to admit, I would sit outside a potential customer’s office in my car, terrified with such fright that I was unable to go in. Remember, in those days there were few computers, no laptops, no internet and no cell phones. I was so ashamed by this and so fearful that there was something drastically wrong with me, that I was unable to ask for help on what to do about my fear.

My fear was merely a smokescreen, although I did not understand this at the time. The worst that could have happened were all things I could have handled: someone may have been rude, the potential customer merely said no or I may have been propositioned (remember this was a long time ago and that did happen to me.). I didn’t have the tools or know how to deal with my fear. No longer am I at the mercy of my own fear. Because I so acutely understand how fear can stop me (and others) from taking action and pursuing what we most want, I can support others in dealing with their own fear.

Has fear ever stopped you or gotten in the way of accomplishing something or creating what you most want in your life? If your fear keeps you stuck, I want to support you in making friends with your fear. I want to empower you to turn your fear into an ally instead of an enemy.

Until next time,

Amy Barnes MA MBA LMHC
I empower people to discover their gifts, talents and self worth.

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Posted in Empower, Fear, Feelings, Uncategorized

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Free to Be

Posted on July 21, 2011 | Leave a comment

Maybe you know someone like “Larry” or maybe you are a lot like “Larry.” Larry has never been able to please his Father. He went into the family business and married a woman that pleased his parents. He went to college and selected a major not based on his interests but based on what would be a good fit with the family business and please others. He has done well in his life but he has never been happy. For some people this would be a great scenario and they would be very happy. For someone like Larry whose interests and dreams are not in alignment with others expectation of him, happiness eludes him. He can never be happy living a life out of alignment with who he is.

Many of us are a little like Larry. We make decisions in our life not because it is what we really want to do but because it is what others expect of us. We have not learned to be comfortable in our skin – we rely on others opinions and we rarely trust out gut – we have trouble making decisions, sometimes even on daily simple things like where do I want to eat, because we have so little faith in ourselves. When does it become okay to listen to our own hearts, our own inner voices and use our own talents and gifts in a way that best fits us and best fits the world?

When you are in touch with and use your gifts, talents and passions, you become fully alive and fully you. Amazingly, fully being you frees up a tremendous amount of energy and gives you a much better opportunity to be both happy and successful in all areas of your life. As a coach, I empower clients to get in touch with their own gifts and talents and passions so they can most fully be themselves at work and play and in their relationships. Being ok with who you are – all of you is the basis of self-worth, self-esteem and self-confidence. I believe we were not created to be anything different than we are. I believe that we each have the potential for greatness inside us that can best be accessed by fully being ourselves.

I want to empower you to be the best you can be, by being yourself.

Amy Barnes, MA MBA LMHC

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Posted in Aliveness, Amy Barnes, Coach, Empower, Self Confidence, self esteem, Self worth, Uncategorized

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Stop Fighting Fires

Posted on July 14, 2011 | Leave a comment

Continue reading →

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Posted in career, Coach, Empower, Stress, Uncategorized, Zone of Genius

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Do You Want to Play Big or Small?

Posted on June 27, 2011 | Leave a comment

by Amy Barnes, MBA MA LMHC
Until recently I didn’t realize that I had a choice. Then I realized how small I had been playing. I could make lots of excuses about why I was playing small, not working up to my full potential or using all my gifts and talents in most areas of my life. The unpleasant truth was that I had chosen to show up being less than I could be.

I could make lots of excuses. I could blame my childhood or the fact that I felt it would take too much of time and energy or that I would have to be different than who I am or others wouldn’t like me or I just didn’t believe in myself.

I think the truth was closer to I have been doing the same thing for a long time and had fallen into a rut. Not necessarily an unpleasant rut. I like my coworkers. I thoroughly enjoy working with the vast majority of my clients.

I’ve been doing this for almost 15 years and it’s time I gave myself a promotion. As a body centered coach and therapist I’ve learned more tricks, more tools more ways of working with people to get them from where they are to where they want to be much more quickly and easier. I need to appreciate my own growth and new skills. I need to listen to myself and trust my gut to know it’s time to do things differently. It’s time for me to spend more time in my own Zone of Genius.

Just as I support and empower my clients to be the best they can be I also need to do that for myself. So in the coming months you’ll see changes in my website and changes in how I go about doing business so I can reach more people in a way that is best for both myself and my clients.

I encourage you to play big, not stay small and I’ll do the same for me. In the meantime contact me if you feel I can support you in going from where you are now to where you want to be in all areas of life – both work and play.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Until next time,

Amy

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Posted in Appreciation, Body Centered Coach, Body Mind Vibrance coach, Empower, Life Coach, Trust your gut, Uncategorized, Zone of Genius

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Can You Transform Your Pain into Joy?

Posted on May 16, 2011 | Leave a comment

Bethany Harper, The Real Soul Surfer

What about you makes you who you are today?

Were you able to overcome some obstacle to getting what you want or doing something you were told you could never do? These stories are what make the stories of heroes.

At age 13, in 2003, surfer Bethany Hamilton lost her left arm to a shark attack. A month later she was back on her board and in 2005 she won a national championship. Now at 21 she has a movie Soul Surfer based on her life. How did she have the resilience to get back on the board and not just to move on with her life but to flourish?

On the hand, think of the many lottery winners, instead of using the winnings to make a positive difference in their lives proceeded to loose everything. These are the stories of tragedies.

We all have obstacles in our lives. How we are able to deal with those obstacles is what makes a difference in each of our lives.

I want to empower people and give them the skills to deal with those obstacles well. The skills of resilience can be learned.

If someone made a movie about your life, would you be the main character? Would you be the hero and the star?

I support people empowering them to overcome obstacles so they may step into their full power and creativity. Call me if you are ready to take charge of your own life and thrive.

Until next time,

Amy Barnes MBA MA LMHC

Amy is a relationship counselor and coach with over 15 years experience, specializing in empowering individuals in transforming their pain into joy so they may step into their full power and creativity.

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Posted in Empower, Joy, Pain, Power, Transformation, Uncategorized

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Pain and Joy

Posted on December 2, 2010 | Leave a comment

by Amy Barnes MBA MA LMHC

Pain and Joy are deeply connected. Sounds like they don’t have much in common. Yet as I work with clients, as a therapist, counselor and coach, I empower people like you to move from pain to joy. These two deep feelings are intricately entwined. They have everything in common. Often we become numb to the pain. The pain over a broken relationship or over not being where we want to be in life or not liking who we are is too much and we shut down. To protect ourselves from the pain we also shut ourselves off to the joy.

Bah! Humbug! Don’t want to feel the pain. Don’t want to feel the joy. It feels safe to stay numb. You may find yourself irritated at all those happy people or getting tired of putting on a happy face. Or you may in fact feel quite split. You may feel at times, joyful and at times feeling the pain.

I support clients in dealing with the pain so that they can discover and stay with the joy. I empower clients who are willing to do what it takes to transform pain into joy, to step into their full power and creativity.

You deserve to have a wonderful life. Isn’t it time you gave yourself a gift: The gift of joy.

If you are serious about making positive changes in your life, give me a call. I look forward to hearing from you.

Until next time,

Amy Barnes MBA MA LMHC

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Posted in Empower, Joy, Relationships, Transformation

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What I Learned From My Flooded Basement

Posted on June 23, 2010 | Leave a comment

After yesterday’s monsoons, a few inches of water in the basement, and a failed sump pump, I am now the happy owner of a 1/6 HP submersible pump. Very empowering to come out on top of what could have been a major problem. First thanks to Randy, the manager of my local Ace Hardware at 86th and Westfield for more of his always helpful advice on what to do. My basement had quickly transformed itself from a dry to a very wet basement.

I have been appreciating myself for my ability to solve life problems. To figure out what to do next seems to have always been a strength of mine that I have taken for granted. I think of it like solving geometry problems. First you figure out all the things you do know. In geometry, it might be angles or the length of one or more sides or the relationship of one angle or side to another. For the basement, the job was too big for my wet dry vac. I had to be back at the office in two hours. I also knew I could ask someone else for help.

Transformation and change can be that simple. First taking stock of where you are in life and then realizing that where you are is not where you want to end up. Sometimes you know where you are going and how to get there and sometimes all you know is that you don’t want to be where you are.

In this case I knew I wanted a dry basement, as simply, easily and inexpensively as possible. I found someone to ask who I knew I could trust to either help or point me in the right direction. In this case I asked Randy and he helped me with the solution, the submersible pump.

With life issues it’s also important to be willing to ask for help. Life issues are not always that easy to solve. Being willing to ask the questions could be a major step in either creating a solution or making a change or transition in your life.

I’m here and I’m looking forward to your questions.

Until next time,

Amy Barnes, Life Coach for Leadership and Transformation

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Posted in change, Empower, Life Coach, Transformation, Uncategorized

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If You Couldn’t Fail What Would You Do?

Posted on March 23, 2010 | Leave a comment

by Amy Barnes, Life Coach

Yesterday’s rain has gone.  This morning I woke to birds’ chirping and sun. (Actually I didn’t see the sun until it rose, glowing and red through my office window.)  The earth had changed overnight from pasty dull winter colors to green everywhere.  Spring is here.  We count on spring.  We know and trust that without fail once a year we have spring.  Our land here in central Indiana changes from cold and muddy and frozen to warm and playful and green and spring.  Without fail, spring comes every year. 

As a life coach I love asking the big questions or perhaps because I like asking the big questions I became a life coach.  So what would you do if you could not fail?  If what you most wanted to do and desired would come just as dependably and reliably as spring comes.  What would you do if you could not fail? 

Most people would rather stay small, to not attempt big things or be big in the world.  Most people are more guided by a fear of failure than the promise of success.  Better to stay small than to stand up and risk failure. 

 Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.  –Thomas Edison

Are you more concerned with success or cutting your losses?

Would you live your life differently if you knew you could not fail?
What would you do for a living?
What decisions would you make?
What would you do the same or different in your personal life?
 If not now, when?

When do you plan on having a wonderful life?
The cheese has been moved.
The goldfish has been washed out to sea. 
The economy and world have shifted.
So what now?

If you couldn’t fail, what would you do?

 Amy Barnes, MA MBA LMHC , Life Coach

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Posted in Amy Barnes, Coaching, Fear, Life Coach, Uncategorized

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Transforming Yourself Through Your Stories

Posted on January 12, 2010 | Leave a comment

By Amy Barnes, Life Coach for Leadership and Transformation

 We all share stories both stories of past events and stories of our hopes and dreams.  We share stories about us and we share stories about family members and friends.  Stories can be transforming and empowering or stories can be devaluing and shameful.  The stories you believe and tell about yourself and what you believe about these stories tells much about what kind of person you have become. 

     Invictus tells the story of South Africa, Nelson Mandela and Rugby Captain, Francois Pienaar.  The movie inspires.  Mandela and Pienaar are able to transform an entire country through the game of rugby.  That’s a signature story. 

 We all have experiences both good and bad that have happened to us.  If you had been persecuted and had to go into hiding to not be killed how would you see the world?

With the help of Miep Gies, who died yesterday, we all know the story of Ann frank and her diary.  Ann Frank inspires us. 

Miep Gies rejected being called a hero. She inspires us with the idea that a very ordinary person can do a very extraordinary thing.  We can all make a difference.  We can each do something to help another, perhaps even save a life. 

The transformative stories come from how we face the world and the choices we make.  The transformation comes not from the event itself but in how we choose to interpret the event and the action we choose to take as a result of the event.  Mandela could have caved in after 27 years of unjust imprisonment and even then to hate instead of forgive his persecutors.   

 Miep Gies could have chosen not to risk her own personal safety by helping to hide the Frank family. 

We each can choose whether we become a victim to what has happened in the past or we could use what has happened as a spring board to propel us to greatness.  Same story different interpretation.

You have a choice as do each of us.  We can use what ever has happened in the past, our stories as a way to keep us from greatness or as a way to propel ourselves to greatness.   

 Which will you choose?

 Until next time.

 Amy Barnes, Life Coach for Leadership and Transformation

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Posted in Amy Barnes, Coaching, Empower, Life Coach

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